Let me start by saying that I am by no means a perfect husband. But I try to be the best I can be and what God expects of me as a husband and father. It took me several years, but I figured out something tthe other day while I had time to think during a vacuuming session. I contribute to the household by cleaning bathrooms, cooking (sometimes), and cleaning the kitchen (all the time) and vacuuming. However, I must admit that I complain about it and for the first six and a half years of marriage, Becky has had to remind me to do it.
Recently, she has confessed that she would just like for me to do it without her asking. I heard her say it.......I am an educated adult, so I understood it.......but it really never sunk in to my thick skull. One of Becky's love languages is "acts of service". Although I am tired and don't feel like doing chores after a long work week, I know it means alot to Becky. Take a moment and do something nice for your spouse and see if it makes him/her smile. Even if they don't smile, it's OK, just be selfless today. I have made a personal conviction to get back to my old selfless personality.
Getting Home Today: I actually stayed at work until 11:00 pm last night. I got an email from my boss when I got to school and I called Becky at 7:45 am to communicate early so she wasn't blind sided later in the day. Becky was incredibly understanding and has really been a great support. The life of an administrator can be challenging on a spouse because it is especially unpredictable. Thanks Beck! I love you!
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Sunday, August 16, 2009
The Best Advice From Someone Wiser
I have always put a tremendous amount of value in the wisdom of those who are older than me. Becky pokes fun at me because I am drawn to "older" people and often have long conversations with them. Wisdom does not require a fancy degree or a hefty salary. Wisdom is gained through experience. I hope that my children grow to respect the wisdom and experiences of those who precede them.
My father-in-law gave me the best advice soon after he gave me permission to marry his oldest daughter. Shull (2002) asserts, "Brian, always remember that it comes down to choices. You can either be right, or you can be happy". Very simple, huh? I have lived by that advice and it really makes alot of sense. Hear my heart, it doesn't mean that you just agree with everything that your spouse says to simply appease him/her. It just requires putting your pride aside and don't get caught up in being the "right one" or the person that gets to say "I told you so". As a response to my father-in-law's aforementioned quote, a person responded "Being right is being happy". I just smirked and wished him the best of luck.
My father-in-law gave me the best advice soon after he gave me permission to marry his oldest daughter. Shull (2002) asserts, "Brian, always remember that it comes down to choices. You can either be right, or you can be happy". Very simple, huh? I have lived by that advice and it really makes alot of sense. Hear my heart, it doesn't mean that you just agree with everything that your spouse says to simply appease him/her. It just requires putting your pride aside and don't get caught up in being the "right one" or the person that gets to say "I told you so". As a response to my father-in-law's aforementioned quote, a person responded "Being right is being happy". I just smirked and wished him the best of luck.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
The Reason
I have done some self reflection and spent time praying about being the best husband and father I can be. I named this blog Getting Home because that is what I look forward to doing at the end of my day. I love to race home (via Air Muller in the 1999 Altima) and hear all about what happened at home that day. You see, Becky stays home with the kids. That was a dream of hers and we are fortunate to make it happen. My philosophy is to stay focused, work hard, be thorough, and allow myself to be home before dinner. I had a mentor that once advised me that I have a job to support my family, not a family to support my job. I have lived by this and I do not regret it.
The years have made me wiser. Becky and I will celebrate seven years of marriage this October. Originally, I wanted to dedicate this blog to some of the things that I have learned and post some things that I have learned over the years that have gotten me closer to the kind of husband and father that God wantes me to be. I really don't know where this blog will go. Let's see.
We have a family blog that keeps family and friends up to date on the latest with the Becky, myself, and the kids. If you feel inspired, visit Becky's Blog and you can see for yourself.
Getting Home Today: I told Becky that I would leave a 5:15 and I made sure that it happened no matter what I was doing. I was in fact very busy, but that particular work can wait until tomorrow. My three year old son (who was throwing a huge exercise ball in the house when I came in) was waiting for me. Based on his activity level and the Peanut (11 month old) crawling around while Becky was cooking, I think she was ready for me to be home too.
The years have made me wiser. Becky and I will celebrate seven years of marriage this October. Originally, I wanted to dedicate this blog to some of the things that I have learned and post some things that I have learned over the years that have gotten me closer to the kind of husband and father that God wantes me to be. I really don't know where this blog will go. Let's see.
We have a family blog that keeps family and friends up to date on the latest with the Becky, myself, and the kids. If you feel inspired, visit Becky's Blog and you can see for yourself.
Getting Home Today: I told Becky that I would leave a 5:15 and I made sure that it happened no matter what I was doing. I was in fact very busy, but that particular work can wait until tomorrow. My three year old son (who was throwing a huge exercise ball in the house when I came in) was waiting for me. Based on his activity level and the Peanut (11 month old) crawling around while Becky was cooking, I think she was ready for me to be home too.
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